My way back to you
by ann1981
Summary: Starting with the bar scene in 7.07 where Mark checks out Lexie s ass and she tells him off, from there it will be AU. Mark never sleeps with Callie, there will be no baby. Jackson never gets a chance with Lexie.
1. Chapter 1

_Starts with the bar scene in 7.07 where Mark checks out Lexie´s ass and she tells him off, from there it will be AU. Mark never sleeps with Callie, there will be no baby. Jackson never gets a chance with Lexie._

**CHAPTER ONE**

Mark was sitting in a corner at Joe´s bar, quietly drinking his beer and keeping to himself, he wasn´t really up for company now and already decided that he would go back to his apartment after he finished his beer. That was all he was doing these days. Work, drink a beer a Joe´s, go home and think about Lexie, go to sleep and dream about Lexie, get up for work the next morning. It wasn´t much fun but it got him through the days.

Suddenly a shapely woman form got his eye, in the old days he would have seduced the woman for a good night of sex in his hotel room but ever since Lexie came into his life he had changed, he was a one-woman now. He tried to go back to his old behaviour after the break-up with Lexie but it just didn't work for him.

A few weeks ago Lexie was released from the psych ward where he had her committed. It was one of the hardest things he ever had to do but it was necessary for her. She didn't blame him for it but told him to back off a week later because he was hovering too much. He could not help it, he loved her so he hovered. Now he waited.

Lexie was slowly getting her life back together after the shooting and the temporally freak-out which forced Mark to have her committed. She didn't blame him for it, she just got mad that he was so overprotective of her, so she told him to back off and leave her alone. She regretted saying that because she did not want to hurt him but she needed to stand on her own two feet.

It was the first time after her mental breakdown that she went to Joe´s to get a drink after work. She knew that she needed to get her old life back even if it was on her own, although she would not really admit it to herself, she hated being alone and she missed Mark. Lexie knew that she still loved him deeply even after everything that happened between them.

She sighed at motioned to the barkeeper that she was ready to order a drink. Suddenly she had the feeling that there was someone watching her, not a creepy feeling but a warm safe one. Lexie knew it was Mark before she turned around and saw that incorrigible smirk upon his face.´Were you just checking out my ass?' Lexie tried to sound annoyed but failed miserably when she saw that Mark's smirk deepened and the colour of his eyes darkened in lust.

'Wasn't the first time, won't be the last.' He replied with that cocky attitude of him. He knew that he could still get under her skin and that was exactly what he wanted. He needed her badly.

'No!' she jabbed her finger in his chest and repeated those words. 'No, No!' Lexie tried to sound stern but her reaction was a pathetic attempt. She made the move to turn around and walk away but suddenly Marks hand snatched out and tugged her towards him.

She almost tripped over her own shoes when she landed in his lap and had to steady herself against his chest. Before she could remove herself his arm wrapped around her waist and with his other hand he gently lifted her chin so he could look her in the eyes.

'Come on Little Grey, am I really that bad?

Lexie swallowed deeply at the heartfelt question, he wasn't bad, not in her book but she felt scared, not of him but of her own feelings that kept her up at night and she could not focus during the day, she knew she still had it bad for Mark Sloan. Lexie removed her small hands from his chest and placed them in her lap. She knew that she was going to cry any second now.

Mark felt her trembling in his arms and instinctively knew that he could not let Lexie break down in front of everyone in the bar, he would take her back to his place as it was across the street from the hospital and nearby. He stood up with his arms still around Lexie and left some bills on the table before he made his way out of the bar and held Lexie close to him while he made his way back to his apartment.

Lexie felt numbed by all the conflicting emotions that surged through her but she knew that she was safe with Mark and somewhere back in her mind a tiny voice told her that it was time to stop running and it was okay to fall apart once in a while and let someone take care of you. Well, tonight, she decided to let Mark take care of her.

'Come on Lex, were almost there honey, I'll make you some nice hot cocoa just the way you like it and then you can let it all out sweetheart.'

Mark pressed Lexie deeper into his side while they were walking up the stairs together. Lexie felt the first tears sliding down her face and she could not hold herself together anymore. Mark quickly opened the door and took Lexie by the hand while he closed the door behind them. He got her out of her coat and walked her towards the couch before sitting down and pulling her into his lap, wrapping her up in a tight embrace.

Heartbreaking sobs were coming from Lexie while she was clutching Mark's shirt into her hands and hiding her face into the crook of his neck.

'I...I..I am so sorry...I hurt you!...You love me and I hurt you...I am sorry...Mark...please...I do not want to hurt anymore...I...I love you...always have...so sorry Mark..'

'Sssh sweetheart, I know, I love you too, I am sorry too. I let you walk out on me and I have been a complete ass towards you. It's also my fault.'

Lexie slowly lifted her face of his shoulder and let Mark wipe the tears from her eyes. 'You make me feel safe, even after all we put each other through.' She smiled a little and softly kissed him on the lips and Mark kissed her back.

'We have a lot of things to talk about Lex, if we want us to work again, I am willing to give us another chance, do you?' Lexie nodded her consent and smiled a little. 'Of course but for now let's just stay like this and enjoy each other. I really need you to hold me Mark.'

'Anything you need is yours love, you know that, let's just rest now and we talk later.' Mark stretched along the couch and pulled Lexie beside him, wrapping her back into his embrace. Soon after they were both fast asleep. There was still a long way to go but the first step towards recovery was there. Maybe it was really meant to be.


	2. Chapter 2

**I DO NOT OWN GREY´S ANATOMY OR THE CHARACTERS INVOLVED IN THIS STORY.**

Chapter two

Suddenly startled Lexie woke up from her deep sleep, again another nightmare, she breathed deeply to try to get her breathing under control. She blinked her eyes to get used to the darkness around her. Lexie felt Mark's warm breath against the back of her neck, he was still fast asleep. Did she need him to wake up, so she could tell that she had a nightmare?

She decided to make a cup of hot chocolate for herself to calm down, Lexie had lived here so she knew where everything was and tried to make as little sound as possible. She decided to take a moment for herself before She would wake Mark up. he was still fast asleep so soundly and he looked like he needed that sleep very much. Even though they were apart and she had said to Mark that he needed to stop hovering and leave her alone, she could help it but to watch from a distance and to see how he was coping. She noticed that Mark had almost no sleep over the past few weeks and she felt a little guilty over that.

She opened the top cabinet in the kitchen and saw that he still had her favorite marshmallows lying around, it was an open new bag. He always told her that he also drank the hot chocolate and marshmallows regularly thanks to her, he joked that it would one day make him look fat.. She smiled softly to herself at the thought of that memory. Because she was so caught up in her own thoughts, she had not noticed that Mark had woke up in the meantime. Suddenly she felt two warm arms around her waist.

' I was awake and you were not there, I thought you were gone but fortunately, you are here. ' Mark saw that she was making hot chocolate. ' In the middle of the night Lex? Is everything all right love? ' He had a concerned tone in his voice that still sounded hoarse because of sleep.

´No everything is not all right Mark, I just had another nightmare.´ Mark´s eyebrows shot up into his hairline in surprise, Lexie was willingly telling him that everything was not okay with her, that was strange because she was so much like her sister, denying and avoiding the issue.

Lexie let out a small giggle because of that. `Surprised Mark? Really? I guess I cannot blame you for that. I had therapy sessions with Doctor Wyatt for the last few weeks and before the shooting. Meredith recommend her to me, said that she became all whole and healed because of her...'

Lexie stopped herself from rambling on and on and got serious. 'I have been having nightmares since the shooting Mark, that is one of the reasons that I got so messed up. I could not eat or sleep. It was horrible.' She sat down at the kitchen table and warming her hands on het cup of hot chocolate. Mark took the seat beside her and grabbed one of her hands, intertwining their fingers.

"I get that Lex, I really do and I am so sorry that you had a rough time and for all of these nightmares but answer me this. Why did you keep pushing me away even after I stopped with the hovering. Until tonight I had the idea that you did not love me anymore.'

Lexie looked down at their intertwined hands and then back up, straight into his eyes. "Truthfully? I wasn't myself, I doubted everything about me and everyone around me, even you.'

Before Mark could respond she shushed him with a finger on his lips. "I was a mess and when that's when I started therapy and it became clear to me that if I wanted to move on from this pain. I had to let the people I love back in. I took a long hard look at my life and I realised that you are the only man I ever love. Just as Meredith and Molly are my sisters, even Derek is like a brother to me, but none of them are more important to than you Mark.'

With her other hand Lexie wiped away the few tears that started to fall during her emotional speech, her heart was beating fast, what if she made a fool of herself? What id Mark did not love her anymore like that but just cared for her as a friend. A million questions were running through her head, she was so caught up that she did not notice the look of pure love and awe that Mark was giving her.

Mark decided to take a leap of faith and took Lexie's hand in both of his. 'I am still in love with you Lex, I never stopped. I already said that I know but I have the feeling that I will need to say it a lot more before you completely believe it. I was a manwhore before you came rushing in my hotel room and demanded that I had to "teach you."

Lexie grinned widely at him. "maybe we should do it again?.' What?' The whole teaching thing, it brings back memories, don't you think? Lexie had a mischievous smile on her face. 'No distracting me from my speech Lex! We can do that later.' Mark added with a matching grin.

'Okay where was I, because of you I am a one-woman man now and if you let me I will be the only man for you as long as you want.' How about forever Mark?' Mark sat stunned in silence, he wanted the whole marriage and kids package because he was ready but didn't think she was.

Lexie smiled. 'If I learned one thing from all of this, it's the fact that life too short to waste time. I want us to work together and get back together. A real relationship, no more secrets and hiding and slowly building towards forever, you know...marriage...kids and all that. I say screw my ten-year plan and you know, I did not plan on meeting you and falling in love but we did. So let's make this work. What do you say Mark?

Mark could no longer control himself so he pulled Lexie in his arms and started to kiss her deeply and full of passion. His hands threaded through her hair and when they came up for air after a while, he looked at her like she was the most precious thing he ever saw. "I say yes Lex, I am still completely baffled by your speech. God's woman I love you. Let's start our new life together.'


End file.
